Can Britain and France Survive Their National Suicide Attempts? By Richard Miller (Londonistan)
Britain under Keir Starmer and France under Emmanuel Macron resemble a pair of manic self-harmers, slashing away at their own wrists in a drug-fuelled haze of bad decisions, all while insisting it's "for their own good." The article from the Telegraph (link below) paints them as clownish doppelgängers, Starmer the plodding technocrat, Macron the theatrical showman, both accelerating their nations' decline through eerily synced policies: Economic self-sabotage, immigration chaos, foreign capitulation, and a messianic green gospel that's more virtue-signal than viable. The question looms: Can these two pillars of Western Europe survive their "national suicide attempts," or are they locked in a death spiral? Let's dissect the wounds, gauge the blood loss, and ponder if there's a tourniquet in sight. Spoiler: Survival's possible, but it'll take a populist detox to staunch the bleeding.
The Shared Scars: A Playbook of Mutual Destruction
The parallels between Starmer and Macron are uncanny, like two addicts sharing the same needle. Both swept to power promising "change," only to double down on the status quo's worst excesses, fiscal recklessness, immigration overload, and a retreat from global influence that reeks of defeatism.
Start with the economy: Both nations are racing to the bottom in the stagnation Olympics. The IMF's latest World Economic Outlook (October 2025) forecasts UK GDP growth at a tepid 1.3% for 2025, edging out France's 0.7% (that's Macron doing "cardio" to Starmer's plod). Per capita? The UK lags the G7, with IMF warning of the "worst living standards growth in the West." France's debt-to-GDP hits 116%, up from Macron's entry point, with public spending devouring 57% of GDP. Starmer's Labour isn't far behind: Rachel Reeves' budget threatens wealth taxes, capital gains hikes, and raids on ISAs, echoing Macron's confiscatory follies. Both face ballooning deficits, France's exploding under Macron's watch, Britain's set to worsen with Labour's "socialising" via the Employment Rights Bill. X users are savage: "Starmer and Macron: Twins in failure, united in decline."
Immigration's the open vein: Net figures are eerily matched, UK at 431,000 for year ending December 2024 (down from peaks but still sky-high), France at 433,000 per Insee, pushing immigrants to 11.3% of population. Both lost control: Britain's post-Brexit surge, France's unchecked flows. Foreign policy? Capitulation city: UK cedes Chagos, France retreats from Africa; both kowtow to bad actors (China for Starmer, Algeria/Hamas for Macron) for domestic votes. Military readiness? Laughable, armed forces underfunded, recruitment tanking.
And the green zealotry? Both preach net-zero messianism, Macron's "net zero land development" stifles housing, Starmer's windfarms dot the landscape, while ignoring realities like energy costs and grid failures. It's self-harm: Policies that erode wealth, security, and cohesion, all for ideological highs.
The Manic Phase: Why the Self-Destruction?
This isn't incompetence, it's ideological addiction. Starmer and Macron embody "centrist dad" hubris: Technocratic fixes masking decline. They're defenders of a crumbling order, globalism, EU ties (for Macron), woke empathy, that's fuelling populist rage. Voters hate it: Macron's approval hovers at 25%, Starmer's Labour polls crater post-election. On X, it's brutal: "UK under Starmer: Endless excuses, steep decline." Both refuse accountability, blaming predecessors while slashing at their own economies.
The "manic self-harming druggie" metaphor fits: Like addicts, they chase short-term highs (virtue-signals, subsidies) ignoring long-term ruin. France's Fifth Republic teeters; Britain's post-Blair constitution frays. Without intervention, overdose looms, economic collapse, social unrest, populist revolutions.
Survival Odds: Can They Quit the Habit?
Short answer: Yes, but it'll hurt. Britain's got advantages: Brexit's flexibility, a pro-capitalist Right (Farage, Badenoch) poised for restoration. A Tory-Reform alliance could undo Labour's damage, reform pensions, counter Blobby bureaucracy, slash migration. Polls show Reform surging; Starmer's scandals (freebies, donor ties) could topple him early. France? Trickier, Macron's wrecked his party, paving for Bardella or Leftists. A Sixth Republic might emerge peacefully, but civil war risks if reforms fail. Both need detox: Fiscal sanity, border control, energy realism.
Demographics help: Aging populations demand pension fixes (France's 62 retirement age is suicidal; UK's triple lock unsustainable). Populist tides, Trump's U.S., Meloni's Italy, could inspire. But overload? If unchecked migration fragments society further, survival slims.
Britain and France aren't doomed yet, their "suicide attempts" are cries for help in a declining West. Like self-harmers, they've got scars, but resilience too: Histories of rebounding from worse (WWII, revolutions). The key? Voters ditching the enablers, Starmer's soporific statism, Macron's theatrical folly, for sober reformers. If not, the tide of rage sweeps them away. Can they survive? With a populist intervention, yes. Without? Overdose and death imminent.
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